A simple story that explains catfishing
"I made a new account on a site which said that new friends can be made here. I myself love to make new friends. I make friends as easily I have my meal. I expected to make a lot of friends online as I do have a good number of friends. As I placed my profile picture and started finding people I found many new people. A person who really liked my picture texted me with a "hi!" and showed interest to speak to me.
As I love speaking to new friends, I continued. For some days we spoke general things like the area we stay, my family, my educational institution and so on. We kept in touch. Slowly we moved on to a different extent. One fine day, on him asking me I shared my picture. I asked him to do the same. But he said that he never liked to take pictures and he doesn't have any pictures of his.
Our relation grew on. I really liked the way he spoke to me. He tried impressing me, but very realistically. That made me happy for a while. I always saw him as a friend. But day by day it was getting deep. He started to speak about my anatomy in the pictures I shared. I did not like it much. Thought it was disturbing I continued to text him hoping for a positive zone in him.
As days passed he stressed me more to send my pictures. He would leave me messages to speak even though I said I was busy. He spoke like he was possessive about me which I couldn't digest. But I always wanted to know why he never changed his profile picture and never shared his pictures.
I never shared all this with my closest friends. But it was a time that I had to say it to her. She asked me to show the profile. I did. She was shocked to see it and said that it was her uncle's profile. She accidentally knew that he was handling two or three fake profiles. She found his handling this account once. And on asking he skipped it saying some unusual reason she said. Her uncle was already married and had two kids.
On knowing this I was really upset and deactivated all my social networking sites and even changed my number." This is a sad story of a teenager which she shared only with her friend and her personal diary. This is the situation of many of the teenagers these days. They can't share their situation with their parents and sometimes some kids keep it a secret with their friends too. In this way, they get frustrated and drawn to deep depression. Some of them cannot handle such a smooth situation and start tends to end their lives.
Catfishing – one of its Meanings:
The Sun: What is catfishing, how do you know if it's happening to you and why do people do it? - Every person has digital knowledge these days. People are that addicted to social networking and dating apps that they don't even try to think second before making new friends online. Even though the sites provide us security, we cannot stop crime happening. It's observed that the cyber-crime had increased to a great extent, that it has affected even the developing nations. When it comes to making friends and date online with strangers, even the most educated people cannot help themselves get cheated.
How did this word originate?
This word has a story behind it. It is an old fish story told to Nev Shulman about stimulating code to increase the taste and texture. This story says how fishermen increased the taste and texture of catfish. While the catfish is transported from Alaska to China the fish lost their texture and taste as they were tanked. Someone came up with an idea to put catfish in the tanks with the cod. Being a natural predator the catfish would chase the cod and keep them moving and agile. This increased the texture and taste of the catfish indeed.
This is how people are cat fished online. To do this all they need is a fake profile with a fake picture. Every individual who is connected to this world of social networking and online dating apps would not have been cheated or would cheat, but definitely must have met a wrong person online. According to researchers, in every 10 accounts, at least one is found fake.
Why does this happen?
A person sits in his couch texting busily. His friend texting him "Hi bro!"
He replies "Hello bro! Where have you been? Why don't you hang out at my place?"
"That will only happen when you shut your mobile and look at me, bro!" Replies the frustrated friend who has been waiting for an hour sitting next to his friend who is busy texting.
This is what's happening. No one has time for real conversations. Everyone is busy living in their virtual life. This is what made people find friends and partners online. But the question of security is never answered. Even countries like India has addressed many cyber crimes, fake social media accounts, and bogus companies that sprouted the seeds of online crimes. This has increased to a great extent that even they start blackmail on the basis of the screenshots of their texts and the images they shared. This may create victims.
What is it exactly?
People who are constantly rejected by others due to their looks or who cannot who do not have the guts to face the consequences of situations tend to involve in such issues. They pretend to be friends at first and further show their real colours. The other person who makes feelings for them on the other side gets low emotionally. They say it's embarrassing and hurting to come to know that the person whom they cared for is 'nobody'. Even the phone calls that they make can fool you to the core.
How can we know or assume that we are being cheated?
Dr. Phil: Online Dating Red Flags: Warning Signs of a Catfish - "It's been weeks that we are texting, but I have never seen your recent pictures. You do not upload it or you don't even send me one. Why is it?" Asked the 16-year kid to his new online unknown friend.
"I don't share them online because I don't like myself exposed to the public. And I don't share even with you or my friends as I have security issues" lies the 40-year-old lady.
This often happens when asked for personal information too. This is how the other person can indicate that he or she is cheating on you. The person asks for all our personal information and tries collecting all our images but they never provide us that relevant information about them often. Signs include refusals to meet in person, refusals to video chat, claims of a serious disease or injury, unusually attractive profile images, personal information that doesn't add up, or requests for money.
When this always happens and seems unusual to you, it is better that you stay away from that person. Blocking them or avoid giving them your mobile numbers and house address can be some of the measures. Once the issue of money enters the conversation with your unknown friend, think it's time to ignore the person.
What are the effects?
University of Arizona - The Wildcat Daily: Online dating: so fun, much catfish - We are not that socially interactive. We cannot speak so effectively or we are afraid of speaking to a particular person and getting rejected. The immediate way we find to interact in that case is a social network. We are addicted to find new friends and speak to new people. We create an account in the social media and make new friends. But the person on the other side does not have the same intention sometimes.
When a person is texting you daily and making you fell so special, according to human psychology we will surely like the person and feel like sharing every information with him. But when we come to know that the person you are texting is not really who you think, then it would affect us mentally as well as emotionally. We may get disturbed and stop believing people like you did before.
The dating scene has been changing over the last decade. According to the Pew Internet and American Life Project, approximately 6% of Internet users who are in a marriage or other committed relationship met online, compared to 3% who reported this in 2005. Additionally, 42% of Americans know someone who has used an online dating site or app, an increase of 11% from 2005, and 29% of Americans know someone who has met their partner through this medium, compared with 15% who made this claim in 2005.
How can parents make their influence on children in such an aspect?
HuffPost: Catfish: Why Parents Need To Discuss It With Their Teens - The most common reasons for this situation to occur to a teenager, especially, is just due to the lack of communication between his or her parents or caretakers. When we are fair enough to your parents and share such sensitive issues parents try to console their kids through which they would not make violent decisions. They would surely scold them for what they did, but would never leave them in such a situation.
"Prevention is better than cure." Parents should take due care of what their children are seeing on the internet? Whom are they speaking to on the mobiles? What kind of people he/she mingles with outside? Is she really regular to the his/her educational institution? How many friends does she\he have of the opposite gender? With whom does she share all her images and screenshots with? Is she stalked, followed or being cheated by someone whom she doesn't know? How does she behave with elders and her teaching staff? And a lot of her personal information.
Being protective doesn't mean taking his/her freedom but knowing what they are up to. This is most important. As, if they do not get their freedom or found you stalking him/her, they would never dare to say anything wrong happening to them.
Conclusion
University of Texas Center for Identity: Online Dating Scams, Red Flags, and What is "Catfishing"? - This digital world can do a lot of favour and a miserable disdain at the same time. The friends we make on the internet would never make us a legendary person. But the friends and people whom you have during the time of happiness and trouble makes it all. Make meaning friends have good relation with elders and your parents. Think twice before you share your personal information. Keep all your social networking accounts private and keep checking for any spams in it. Make meaningful and helpful friends. Speaking to strangers is not a bad habit, but be aware of who the person.
The world of the internet always looks interesting. When you use it in a good way it would show no harm. But once you behave like a cat drinking milk with eyes closed and thinking you are not seen by anyone, you would definitely be hit by someone. It's very important that you keep updating yourselves with improving technology.
The technology has gone to a great extent that even the files of the bigger companies are being hacked and they do demand for money or something else. Then we should know where we stand amongst this situations. As the cybercrime has increased, every government has taken good measures to prevent all such aspects. Even a report of cheating online is taken seriously by the police management and being solved.
Catfishing is a fun for some. And turns to land them in trouble for the other. This online crime is being a Hawke these days and almost all measures are taken to prevent them from happening. It is also our responsibility that we need to help our friends and well-wishers from falling into this pit. Parents, caretakers, friends should try to understand the situation of a victim and act accordingly.