1Sarge: A 42-year record of true love to her last breath.

I hope in how I introduce myself that it might be of a benefit to those not sure what to look for as they seek someone on this site. I learned about true love from my late wife & her ten years of suffering with cancer until she passed away just into March of 2019. I am blessed as I had true love with love at first sight for a little over 42 years. I learned devotion when in those ten years, her pain was too intense for us to enjoy the physical pleasures we both wanted. I chose to stay celibate all ten years & still am. I will continue to until someone worth the wait for that comes along. I loved her so much that making her smile unexpectantly & putting both her wants & needs above my own was not an obligation, but my joy. Any man doing less is neither a real man nor is only in love with himself. With that, welcome to the world of users, losers, & abusers. How we fell so deeply in love is by the things I am about to describe. If God grants me a new love, I've loved this way too long not to do the same for her. We dated as only friends to give our hearts time to know each other and to make sure what seemed OK in the moment won't be a regret later. Then we romanced as best friends. We already adored each other at that point as friends, and it feed the romance in a much stronger way. We did sex last & in God's time. Having sex just for pleasure is taking what you want with very selfish motivations. It has no true love. Waiting until true love is known to be real magnifies the pleasure with such intensity. You give instead of taking by using this pleasure as a way to show how much you want & need them & to say "I love you" with truth. This is so much more mature & it lets us give each other our best. Waiting says "you are so worth the wait" & when the wait is over, it shows how right you were in that statement of value of them. Relationships are not about one be overpowering or demanding of the other. Mater-slave relationships and reporting to each other is foolishness. Love works best with openness, honesty, respect, trust, and being fair & helpful to each other. If these are there, the only demands you need are faithfulness and love to be true. without these things, love dies, if it ever started. Many of you have lived with the users, losers, and abusers. this includes the control freaks & cheaters, as they do exactly those three things. If I can't give you the time and space you want to do some things without me, then there is no trust, thus no love. It's why you don't have to report every detail to me or check in with me or ask my permission to do things. If love is there, so is trust, and these things become ignorant. I won't be the jerk to press you into romance, sex, or even hugs, kisses, or hand holding. As a retired soldier, I signed an oath to protect your freedom which gives you the freewill to decide these things without pressure from me. So, if I don't pursue taking the relationship farther, it's because I am not sure your freewill wants to go there. I just need to be made aware of it so I can use my freewill to decide if I am in sync with what you want to do. This freedom of choice thing is big with me as I've had family & friends sucked in by those who didn't give them the freewill choices without pressure. So, I am this way because I have a "put her first" attitude. Do note that while I prefer you be open and honest and just say how you feel in a tactful way, I am not opposed to you taking my hand, or sneaking in an innocent hug, kiss, or such. If I'm not ready, you'll know. I am easy to read. I miss having a cuddle buddy more than I miss sex. I love to have someone around I adore that adores me back. I miss those goodnight kisses every night, and often through the day as the chances allow. I am not ashamed to show affect publicly in tactful ways. I may have to wear dentures since I was once a foolish teen who didn't tend to my teeth. I can't give babies to those who want them as the Army ordered me to "get fixed", to use their words, and they "neutered" me like they said they would. If these are bearable to get the deep & true kind of love I can offer with my 42 years of true love experience, I hope I'm worth considering. I don't do clubs, bars, or the party scene. I don't like smoking as my system doesn't do well being around any kind of smoking. I prefer no drinking or drugs, but I can tolerate very light drinking & CBD oils if used for medical reasons only. I am very conservative politically & if you lean strongly as a liberal, Communist, Socialist, or other "left leaning" political stances, I won't respond to your messages. I was raised Baptist but prefer a traditional Christian belief that isn't a "holy roller tongues speaking" in doctrines. I'd be better off with someone more faith neutral. No hate to the holy rollers or the left leaning political people. We're just too different to match up well. I like doing things at a walking pace or less unless necessary. You miss too much of your surrounding and those around you by moving too fast. Let's keep moving when we can to stay fit in body & mind. Like bargain hunting, local event, walking trails, enjoying nature, or visiting new or historical places. I lie researching my family tree, which is quite historical in itself. I love Southern Gospel music more than any other genre. I like country, pop, oldies, & most any genre that's more mellow & not blaring. I like churches with the old hymns, or any kind of southern or country flavor to the sound of it. I like to travel, but I don't want to leave the USA. If your profile counters mine, don't expect a response if you put activity on my account. If reading my profile through and respecting it isn't important to you, then I am not important to you either. No response is better than what I'd really want to say then. I know there is one lady out there who can use my years of true love experience. One that can show true love strongly & freely of their own freewill in return. If you decide that lady might be you, don't be afraid to message me. Let me know you like my profile & if I feel the connect, I'll eventually write back & ask you out. I can't ask you out if I don't know you exist, so don't be afraid to message me. If we get serious, I can sell my home in Indiana & move closer to you. But for now, let's move slow and see if we are a match or not if you want to. God bless no matter if you do or not. If I'm not the right one for you, then we both are one person closer to finding the one who is. Be patient. They may not be available just yet to fit into God's timing. Sometimes patience wins you the best prize. So hang in there.

I am not seeking a twin to my late wife. She's gone & it's time to move on. But what follows is good advice from over 42 years of true love experience to all women, even if I am not being considered. Let the spirit within you masterfully be seen with how you wear that spirit on your outside. Your attire, accessories, & how well you pretty yourself up may help, but your true spirit is what will capture the heart of the right guy for you. No man is worth the misery of suppressing the true you that is within, so be who God designed you to be. So many think the external part of a person is what draws them to another person. But it is the spirit they exhibit from within that attracts the best people. The external can help by looking quite appealing, but the soul of the person is what wins their heart. It is wise to grow love from your heart far more than the sensual part(s). The heart lasts a lifetime while "the other part" last but for a while. That makes the heart worth far more. Show your true worth with your heart to get the best one for you. Make him do the same. This is how I lasted in true love for 42 years to her dying breath. This is the voice of experience. I generally like the sweet soft-spoken ladies, especially if their spirit shows up. But the ladies full of life and a bit crazier acting can have a desirable appeal, despite being the opposite of what I usually prefer too. Be the real you, and the right guy will come when their presence lines up with God's timing. It just may not be the time for things work out quite yet in this moment. Keep the faith, and it will pay off. I seem to be more blessed when I least expect it and am not looking for it when it comes to love. It seems to happen to me when I'm just being me and not seeking it out. On your first dates & in profile photos, here's some wisdom. Your smile shows your heart. Your eyes show your soul. Covering or hiding EITHER makes you look like you have NEITHER. So many photos here show ladies with no smile or even a sweet grin or with eyes that seem soulless. Covering it with sunglasses hides so much your eyes say about your spirit within, so don't. All this is not just unattractive from the outside but exhibits a bit of undesirable misery from within. It will run so many away from you, just like I do. I hope you review your photos & fix it as needed. No photo shows neither too as there's nothing to be seen. It's a mystery in a bad way. Your smile & your eyes are your best assets. Why hide them? These two things are also a huge part of wearing your spirit within you masterfully on your outside. Your eyes & smile display it well when you add being full of life to it. Use them & most of the rest of your spirit will follow. This is what made me fall for my overweight late wife with love at first sight. Even before we met or spoke, I was in love. So, yeah, it works! May you share a love so strong that making each other smile when they least expect it is the joy of your lives & may there be a trust that creates a deep true love that's beyond your imaginations. I had it for 42 years. I truly wish the same for each of you as well. God Bless!

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