How to End a Short Term Relationship Quickly and Politely

Have you ever been in a short term relationship, or even a first date with someone and just didn't feel the chemistry? Maybe he or she just isn't attractive, or maybe there was some really short-term chemistry that immediately fizzled out (beer vision?), or maybe their personality wasn't what you first expected. We all know the feeling, it's highly uncomfortable "forcing" a relationship with someone you just aren't into, but at the same time, you don't want to hurt their feelings. We will offer some dating advice on how to end these kinds of relationships quickly and politely.

Break Up Earlier Rather Than Later

In a short-term relationship when you are just starting to date, it is best to break up early. The longer you stay connected with someone that you aren't into, you are missing out on more potential dates. At the same time, your partner may be falling more and more for you, building a deeper connection, which is going to be an ugly experience if you suddenly break up with them later. So the earlier you break up, the less damage there is going to be.

Thinking and Deciding to Break up

Ending a relationship isn't something you should do without careful consideration, and is not something you should do too quickly. At the beginning, there must have been a reason why you two connected to begin with. Ask yourself why everything has changed. There are countless times when partners have regretted breaking up too early or breaking up for the wrong reasons. Like in any kind of relationship, you should think about why you want to break up with them or determine whether there is still a connection that can be built if you continue dating with them longer.

Talk to Your Partner - Don't "Ghost" Them

"Ghosting" is a term that describes ending a relationship by simply ignoring and avoiding your partner. Don't do this! And whatever you do, do not date multiple partners at the same time (hint: It can ruin all of your relationships and your dating reputation - always break up before dating someone new)! Although some people "get the message" when their partner begins ghosting, many will be confused, especially if the relationship has lasted through a few dates. If you are going to end the relationship, you should meet your partner in person (don't break up via text/phone), in public place where there aren't too many people around and where you will have some privacy to talk. Do not meet at each other's residence. Meeting in public will help keep the discussion civil, and if things take a bad turn, you can make a quick exit.

When talking about breaking up, always be respectful to your partner. You are trying to end the relationship politely. So remain positive and don't point out your partner's negatives and don't get into the "blame game", pointing out faults, etc. Many times in these short-term relationships, nobody did anything wrong! Oftentimes, you or your partner just wasn't "feeling it", the chemistry wasn't there and it simply wasn't anyone's fault. If both of you didn't feel chemistry with each other, then it's a pretty easy relationship to walk away from and both of you will be happy.

The key is to make the breakup "official" and tell your partner that it's time to part ways. Be brave and confident - call it what it is, a break up. That way there is no confusion that the relationship is still ongoing. Say it politely like: "You're fun guy/gal, but the chemistry just isn't working for me", or "It's not your fault, I'm just not into you, we should see other people". If you are still "kinda" into them, you could say "I'm not ready for a relationship right now, it is moving too quickly".

Most of the time, this will be more than enough to politely end the relationship (you gotta end it at some point, right?). Surprisingly, both sides are pretty cool and understanding, it's is pretty easy and pain-free to end a relationship quickly. Like I said though, the earlier you break up, the better - especially during or after a first or second date.

When Your Partner Refuses to End the Relationship

In most cases, if you aren't into your partner, they often pick up on the ques pretty quickly and it's much easier break up with them - both sides understand. However, there are cases where your partner will be completely blindsided. The longer the relationship has drawn on, the more difficult these kinds of breakups happen, since you've continued dating them (maybe 4, 5 or more times) and flattering them with false compliments for awhile, even though you aren't into them. They may begin screaming, crying or even try fighting during a breakup (which is why breaking up in a public place is the safer way to go), but you need to remain calm. You can even comfort them, just don't give in and fall back into a bad relationship.

In these cases, you must remain firm in your decision to break up with them, and you must make that (politely) clear to your partner. Don't raise your voice or yell at them in anger, just talk to them calmly and positively. Since you've already thought long and hard before deciding to end the relationship, you shouldn't cave in to your partner and make them think you've changed your mind and the relationship will continue. That will only lead to confusion and (likely) a bad relationship. Sadly, some of these types of relationships lead to miserable marriages, which can end up lasting years or a lifetime - because you weren't confident enough to break up with someone you didn't truly love! Do what is right in your heart.

After Ending Relationship - Give Your Partner Some Space

Once the hard part of breaking up is done, only then does "ghosting" becomes appropriate. You should cease all communication with your partner. Do not call them or text them anymore (at least not for awhile). Communicating immediately after a breakup only leads to more confusion. The goal is to "move on", not stay connected. Do not meet them in person either, simply just ignore them. Hang out with your friends or find new dates to hang out with.

The same goes with social media. If your partner is posting on Facebook or social media, don't write comments and don't send them "likes". In fact, you may want to unfollow them, especially if you get into a new relationship (your partner may get jealous). The key is to move on, not connect! The timing that you should stay disconnected with them depends on how severe the breakup was. If it was an easy breakup with very little romantic connection, perhaps you could reconnect as normal friends very quickly. If it was a severe/awful breakup, perhaps you shouldn't connect for a few months, years, or never again.

Moving On to New Relationships, Dates or Even Dating Your Ex Again

After you've decided to end your relationship with your guy/gal, you could simply live the single life, or look for new relationships at any time. You shouldn't communicate with your ex for some time after breaking up, perhaps not for months if the breakup was severe. Even though you broke up with them, you might still consider them friends. If the breakup wasn't too severe, you could contact them months down the line as a friend.

In fact, it is not uncommon for some people to break up, only to fall back in love with each other again months later - and at that time, the relationship blooms into something with much more chemistry. The key in these type of cases was to be separated for a time and re-think your partner and relationship. That's why it's good to be polite and calm when breaking up, thinking hard before breaking up and choosing the right words to say during the breakup.

Most of them time, relationships only last once and have very little chemistry. The whole point of casual dating and short-term relationships is to find the right person for you and to fall in love with. It may only take one date, or it may take a number of them until you find the right guy/gal. In these cases, it's simply time to look for a new date (at LetsHangOut.com Dating). Our dating site, LetsHangOut.com, is a 100% free place to find dates and view profiles all across the country - all single men and women. Search for dates or continue reading our dating advice!

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